We do most of our learning by the first four years of our lives, they say. I tend to minus the first nineteen years, (up to twelve years in childhood, then the emo teenage years.) I mean besides our activities of daily life, what aspects of serious life business do we know before we are out of high school? "Plenty," says my husband, because according to him a lot depends on where we come from. He thinks that if you are sheltered you don't learn much, but if you suffer through childhood and teenage years you learn a lot. So, would we know how to recognise kids who are distressed or stressed even and are thinking of killing themselves? I mean if you are a teenager and you see a young girl in deep depression because she is watching her parents go through a divorce would you think she would OD? Or would you just think that it is one of those things emo teenagers go through? Even as an adult if you see an otherwise pleasant co-worker unusually quiet or even complaining that his wife is always putting him down would you think that he would kill himself after killing his wife and kids? How do we know how to help people preemptively? Can we learn?
If you are that one person who is always ahead of the game when it comes to arranging secret Santa or are the person who buys a birthday card and collects wishes for someones birthday, then you can be that person to suggest to the HR of your company to see if there can be a counselor who can come and lecture at your facility. If you are a parent of a kid in high school, you can ask your school board to train people to watch out for signs. I think what we need to do is look out for each other.
Two murder suicide cases on national television are more than enough to make me break till I shatter. It is time we say something to the people with clout.
7 comments:
A very timely post. I love what you said, that's it's time we start to look out for each other. So very true-
Hmmm Munir. Most times your ideas strike me on my head! ;-) Such are the times I wonder about your childhood, those 19 years. You are quite a different person, and that makes you amazing.
I would agree with your husband that its the early years of life that make you, that moulds the person in you. That would include your general outlook of the world, your attitude to it and a very basic foundation to your overall learning that can only be hardly shattered. Further learning, what we actually conceive and refer to as learning are built upon those basic blocs. This is what I believe. I'll watch out for other's views about this. Great post Munir
I found two organizations that are working to prevent teen suicide. I think it may help you Munir if you did some voluteering to help others because you become so sad at the problems of children. If you felt you were helping I think that would help you.
www.itgetsbetter.org and
http://www.sprc.org/
What has been striking to me are the numerous cases of murder suicide...it seems people are disintegrating under the pressures of daily life and the support is lacking, but who's fault is that?
I truly don't know if we can assign blame but maybe we need to be more sensitive to others? I don't know what the answer is...
The title of your blog says much....we need to "focus"...focus on our families, friends and coworkers. But people will always do the unexpected and the unimaginable and we are, many times, unable to do stop it. But we can't give up hope...or turn out backs and think "the other guy" will fix things. Sometimes, we're the "other guy"...Very thoughtful post!
You should read about the Indian institutes of Technology. Teenagers commit suicide due to massive pressures to do well. It's heartbreaking.
When it happens to you, you keep wondering why you didn't act sooner.
I don't know Munir, I think even the people with clout are struggling with the same. Because they do have clout their problems are hidden from the general public. I think it's time that social groups start thinking about what is more important. The family unit, and the condition of the family unit can be changed when the people within it want change. You have a great post here. It is one that makes you think.
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