Monday, March 7, 2011

Try to Understand

Yesterday someone asked me if I knew anyone who knows any tricks to do good in MCAT. I said that I was sorry but I did not know anyone who knows any such tricks. Then she went on to say that her granddaughter studied day and night missing all the shows and not seeing any of her friends and she still did not do good. Again I said "Aw." Then she said that her daughter and son-in-law are sending her to the best undergraduate school and paying for private tutor she could go to and still she did not do good, so her son-in-law is upset. I did not say anything although I was so tempted to. She then said "How could she do that, I mean why did she not try harder? You know how hard my daughter works full time and all so she can send her kids to college?" Now that was a little too much.
"How do you know that she did not try enough?" I asked.
"Yeah that is what I am wondering about, why did she not do good in spite of trying." I was not sure what to tell her. Was she implying that her granddaughter is not smart enough or was she implying that her granddaughter did not try enough? So I kept quiet. Meanwhile a lot of things were going through my head. Poor girl, did her parents ever ask her if she was OK, if things in her school (which was away from home) were OK, was the school good in every sense, is she being bullied? Are the subjects she took of her interests? Does she really want to be a doctor? Yeah that one, a big question. I wonder when people will realize that they should let their kids speak up and when they speak, listen and try to understand their view on how they should live. If they are doing something to hurt themselves or others then let them get counseling, but as long as they are preparing themselves to be able to make a decent living , they should let them follow their passion. A carpenter who follows his passion will make some of the most beautiful pieces of furniture, and someone who is forced to be a doctor will never have compassion for her patients.
My parents loved plants. They gave their plants that they grew from grafting to their friends. Their advise to me, "Do not give a gift of a plant to someone who does not like plants. The plant will suffer in the end."


Belle said...

I agree with you, Munir. It seems too much pressure is put on some young people. I also believe people should follow their dreams, not their parent's dreams.

Libby said...

nice! my last post even touched on kids being pushed/encouraged to do what is the parents' dream~!