Dana Reeve, Christopher Reeve's vibrant and sunny wife, was always praised by everyone who heard about her love for her husband (and rightfully so). She was really very gracious because she said "My job here is to be the voice of the many, many spouses who are care givers who do not have the advantage of the world patting them on their back." I say ditto to that. Standing by their hurting family members may seem hard, but if there is enough love, things may seem little less harsh. So, hang in there. Remember you have the graciousness of some one as cool as Dana Reeve.
Christopher Reeve did go through the thoughts of possibilities of having the plug pulled. Shattered C1 and C2 (May 95 accident) can do that to ones morale (when left quadriplegic). Dana Reeves response was "You are still you and I love you."
Dana Reeve herself died of Lung Cancer at the age of forty four.